I thought the boom cooler was impractical and expensive, and the beer pong flash cards were impossibly lame. But this product sets a gold standard for suckitude. I’ll show you three pictures from the site and see if you can figure out what it is.
Okay. Your time is up. Did you think it was a fantasy football trophy? Cause it’s not. The main product is called The Tailgater. Any ideas yet? Well, it’s billed as a “personal portable urinal for tailgaters” that also helps provide “a sanitary tailgating experience”. The top half of the football removes to provide a bowl shaped catcher, which funnels everything down into the base. The other two pictures? But of course, that’s a “privacy poncho” so you can use the bathroom discreetly in the middle of your tailgate, and that other lovely device is the “female attachment”. I know it’s a small photo so you may not be able to tell that it’s “anatomically designed to conform to the female body for comfort and convenience”.
They tried to give it a fancy design and name like The Tailgater but at the end of the day it’s a jar of urine with a funnel. The website doesn’t offer many details, so I’m assuming you’re supposed to take this home with you in the car and pour it out in the toilet or something. I don’t really want to think about it, but this seems like a horrific and smelly problem on somebody’s hands. So what would you expect to pay for this stylish alternative to a plastic gallon jug? $74.95 . I saw this product advertised in the Tailgater Monthly magazine and they also sent me an email asking me to discuss it. So I’m left to assume that this can’t possibly be a clever ruse. If you’re tired of waiting in lines for public bathrooms, have plenty of money, and like taking a hands on approach to waste removal, this is surely the tailgating product for you.
